As a long time techno-optimist, I reluctantly accept it’s time to ditch the screens and *gulp* talk to each other
At 14 years old I made a MySpace page. It was natural to me after many years of curating the perfect combination of emojis for my MSN Messenger username. Sadly, I don’t have any pictures of either of these but trust me, they were very tasteful.
At this time, the world of socialising online was just blossoming. A few of us had mobile phones in their first primative Nokia 3310, forms but you had to top them up with real money. Talking to your friends online, however, was free (as long as you could hog the dial up connection long enough).
I loved every single moment I spent online. I found those spaces fun and freeing and I made friends that I still have to this day. YouTube revolutionised how I found new music — the famous ‘Here It Goes Again’ by Ok Go video was html’ed onto my MySpace wall for weeks — and when I went to university, Facebook allowed me to speak with people living in the same campus before I even got there.
But it was Vine that really cemented my love for this type of media. Similar to TikTok, Vine specialised in short form, 6-second looping videos. The constraints of this led to novel and creative ways of communicating and I can honestly say I spent years of my life laughing and smiling thanks to it.
When TikTok was banned in the US, I was shocked at how distraught I was. I was suddenly disconnected from my community, even though I had never engaged or spoken with any of the people on my ‘for you’ page. It dawned on me that it might not be the best idea to have your emotional support circle be represented by strangers on a phone application.
As I watch the CEOs of almost every major social media removing fact checkers and pivot heavily to exclusionary retoric, I am beginning to wonder what social media is doing for us in 2025. Maybe it’s my age. Maybe it’s the times, but it is starting to get harder and harder for me to ignore the realities of what my favourite apps really are.
The suggestion of connection
In 2015, I researched the movements of the ‘Arab Spring’ where multiple authoritarian regimes in countries such as Egypt and Tunisia were toppled in close succession of each other. These movements were widely believed to have been successful due to the mobilising influence of social media. Particularly in Egypt, sites like Facebook were crucial for communicating and organising multiple different stratas of Egyptian society who later all mobilsed in Cairo’s Tahrir Square. The consequent crack down crippled the economy and Mubarak’s regime quickly fell.
At the same time, #OccupyWallStreet became a trending hashtag. The viral capacity of Twitter helped generate debate around austerity and strict market control and allowed people to share information on the economic and political structures that caused unemployment, inequality and money manager capitalism. The fast movement of discussion led to anti-capitalist movements all across the world.
These successes gave techno-optimists like me a big boost. Social media was not only a safe, free space where people can get together and share their thoughts but a place where people could mobilise together and enact real change.
However, as much as I wished I could end my research there, I also came across ample evidence that showed social media has never been an ‘equal’ medium. As Shoshana Zuboff stated in her incredibly exposing book ‘The Age of Surveillance Capitalism’, the uncomfortable truth is that social media is a tool that uses the private life (and free labour) of an individual to make money. Users’s interests and decisions are sold to advertising agencies, security services or state surveillance teams and none of that money is ever returned to them.
Therefore, even before Elon Musk’s takeover of X, these technologies weren’t the utopian ideal I hoped they would be. In fact, many would argue that the technological oligarchy we are experiencing now isn’t all that surprising — it is the natural consequence of the desire to accumulate more capital.
The obvious conclusion would be to divest entirely from these apps — stop using them, stop talking to your friends on them, stop enjoying them — or find ones that prevent corporate takeover of user data. But how can we reconcile the negative consequences of these platforms with the positive connections they’ve allowed us to build?
With the rise of so many new social medias looking to fill the exodus from X and Meta — such as Substack and Bluesky — the real test will be whether we are able to make these space suitable for what we really need — community.
Or are these tools ever going to provide a space for this?
Replacing doomscrolling with realness
My TikTok algorithm gave me a sense of being surrounded by friends who had the same in-jokes, spoke in the same unique language, and had the same opinions as me. This was fine for a surprisingly long time — it was an easy and enjoyable means of escape — but we are living in a time when we need to work together, in the real world, to make proper change.
Here are some goals I’ve set myself on how to make this transition from screen to street:
- Social media has shown me the type of people I want in my life — funny, progressive, passionate people. Now it is time to use that blueprint to find them and work on collaboration
- I will see the enthusiasm and joy that I’ve so loved in social media as a reflection of my own personality and will aim to spread laughter and creativity where ever I go
- Every chance I get to have an interaction with someone I will take as an opportunity for connection. I will learn to speak with those with different opinions with respect, kindness and empathy so I can be an example of the world I wish to live in
- I will support my local community by shopping local, engaging in local causes I am interested in and giving my time and energy to those I intereact with in a daily basis.
- I will not give in negative rhetoric that aims to bring me down. I will let go of what I cannot control to avoid burnout.
While social media is still a great tool for connecting, the age of mindless scrolling is over. We are missing out on making significant positive connections with each other.
I would like to encourage you all to take a look at who you are, what makes you happy, and how you can use your skills to make a small change for your local community.
It’s needed now more than ever.
Thanks for reading!
What is your relationship to social media? How do you show up for your community irl?
If you feel you are aligned with any of the goals above and would like to connect with me — drop a message in the comments!
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